I was a little nervous. I had a ton of stuff on my old machine and I was vaguely worried about losing something I needed, just because I'm anal that way. We got the transfer of all my files taken care of, and then I had to handle my bookmarks and cookies. I realized then just how long it has been since I went through my bookmarks...
Like anyone else who read a lot of fanfic, I had my file of fanfiction links that I probably hadn't looked at in at least a year or two. They were all organized into different folders - those I'd read and wanted to re-read, those I needed to read (by category/ship), etc. It made me more than a little sad yesterday when I spent an hour checking links and discovered that half of them no longer worked. It's inevitable, I know, since people move on, and I know that others have hit this same thing before me. It just struck me a little hard. Because fic was such a profound part of my life for those years. Because I've gained some real and true friends through the fandom. Because any time a story is lost to the world, it's a little bit dimmer place for it.
I've been melancholy as a result. I was already a little melancholy because of the story Pepper and I are working on, but I really didn't need to see the slow demise of something I loved so much added to it. I don't want to be one of those people obsessed with the past, who can't seem to move on, but I definitely understand them. It's hard to let go of what has given you so much joy. Something you love. Something that still manages to find ways to entertain and beguile.
I'm not done going through my links. I couldn't take it anymore last night. But I will do it again at some point soon. Unfortunately, it's a task that needs to be done. Just only in small bites in order not to overwhelm me.