I'm at a loss. I'm drained. I feel utterly drained. I'm sure it's just a reaction to the funeral, to the reality of this powerhouse of a woman being gone, to the acknowledgment that she's finally where she wanted to be for the past 40 years - back at my grandfather's side, to so very much. And I don't get to slow down. I can't. I have my own life to live, and my own responsibilities, and being reminded today of just how much my grandmother was always doing and did all the way until her death, just makes me feel guilty that I'm even feeling tired in the first place.
I'm not making sense at all, I know. I've just been bottling so much up the past few days and don't have my usual venting places. Ignore the crazy woman. Hopefully all will be well when I return home tomorrow.
